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Just to encourage you to think about why this fills you with dread rather than it being a cause for celebration?
Ask yourself if they were describing the same relationship but with different people would you still be feeling anxious or using words like ‘disgust’?
If your feelings stem more from your problems with relationships and/or confidence, counselling may be of benefit If you have real concerns that won’t go away are you able to speak to them individually or together?
Frame this in a context of being happy for them but having some worries about how you feel.
This might include: At the same time you may want to see the positives about the situation.
Here are two people you care about who have found happiness.
I care for them both deeply so why am I feeling so bad about them getting together? I can’t say I disapprove for fear of losing them both.
That’s not to criticise your reaction or suggest it’s unreasonable for you to feel this way.
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Doing this may help you identify what anxieties you have that are understandable but probably aren’t going to become an issue, and ones where you feel you do need to say or do something – although not necessarily with them.
Writing about how you feel could be a useful outlet, remembering these very strong feelings may subside as you get used to the situation.
It may be they’re so loved up they’ve not thought about how their relationship impacts on others, or perhaps have worries like you do so a conversation about it may reassure you all.
You may privately set yourself some ground rules that may help.
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Petra Boynton is a social psychologist and sex researcher working in International Health Care at University College London.